Let me see…

I haven’t evaluated my 2006. The first three days of the year, I had a slight fever, cough and irritating colds and when I returned to Bataan, my worked schedule is a killer. If this indicates what will be my 2007, then I’ll be a cranky-nut.

Gosh! I wasn’t even able to shop for Christmas presents for my friends. T’is the only year that my December to-do list is outrageous, crazy and screwed.

Contradicting it may seem, I had the most peaceful Christmas and New Year ever. I don’t know how everything just fall into place. I was stuck in the middle of restlessness yet deeper within tranquility embraced me. Okay, insane maybe! As I went on my to-do list, it didn’t bother me anymore on how I’ll be able to wrap it all up. I guess, it’s the spirit of Christmas. The spirit that takes your worries away and makes you smile and hopeful amidst all the hustle and bustle. Geeez! How I love Christmas!!!

My 2006 was really a great, great year. (Year of the Dog…my year…as in…Au-au-au!) hehehe! (actually, I’m under Year of the Monkey). Looking back, the priority to get myself back is a winning struggle… Ha!ha! Because it wasn’t easy picking each broken self-piece after a failed relationship. If there’s a life testimony I’ll give, it will be on moving on. (okay! Enough said). My family bonded more. Seeing my father refraining from drinking alcohol, attending to church masses more often and becoming more loving to my mother is a leap of joy for me. Seeing my mother more and more loving and supportive and keeping the family God-fearing is more than enough to keep my gratitude overflowing.

More than all the blessings I received last year, what I treasure most is my relationships. My relationship with my family, my friendships, my relationship with my self and my relationship with God. My bank account’s balance is still at minimum but I’m proud to say that my relationship account is reaping its fruits. God showered me with so much loving, caring, supportive, encouraging, and enlightening relationships. All heaven’s treasure. (somebody said to me only one relationship is missing… I replied: you won’t feel any is missing if you are happy with what you have…it’s in your perspective).

Let us all see things in a more positive angle and unfold the blessings yet to come…

yeah! Im asking you, "it's 2007 and so?"
except for throwing your 2006 calendar;
except for the change in the year's end number;
except for updating and filing your ITR;
except for buying a new date planner;
except for the years predictions;
except for etc....etc....etc....
what could be the difference?
when everybody's busy making their own new year's resolution...blah..blah...blah...
have you ever stop for a while and think what difference does all of these make?
i mean, after all the merry-making and parties and greetings of better year to come, does it make you a better person?
hmmmm....it is my first article for 2007 and im becoming a pessimist.... no! I'm not!
I celebrated the new year with my family, it was the usual... after attending a mass, we ate the medya noche, mom cooked. So, I still asked what's the difference?
it wasn't all the fireworks nor the noise we created to keep the bad spirits away
it was the peace I felt amidst all the noise, amidst all the celebrations and loud music...
it was the completeness I felt seeing my family together, being with them...
it was the joy in my heart God filled...

“We can only find peace when we accept the things that we cannot change and the people who cannot love us back”. – Joe D’ Mango

I laid all my cards down.
I waived a white flag.
I surrender!!!

The peace I’ve been longing for came by swiftly…
Gently caressed my doubts and fears…
Took away my sadness and grief…

It wasn’t easy though, time lapsed and unaware that I’m drowning from my own desolation.
Two years of struggling to get over with the broken heart…
Two years of fighting against my own principle…
Two years of living in the past…

This Christmas, I took my chances on sacrifice…
I tested myself again…
Will I endure?
Or suddenly give up?
Will I keep my promise?
Or start all over again?

No! I won’t give up!
And I won’t give up!

I had loved you and still loving you…
But I can love more,
But not with you…
Not with you anymore…

You said: I said

Everything is bound to happen. We were not able to talk before you go. Just in case, by any chance, in a strange cosmic conspiracy, you’ll be able to read this.

You said: this isn’t the right timeI said: it was not right… but it was our time. This is our time, it might not be right but it’s not wrong. We found each other, loved each other, in our time.

You said: no matter whatI said: let’s try to work it out. We both know we can, but we did not.

You said: you amaze meI said: you are more amazing than anyone I’ve ever met. We bring out the best in each other.

You said: I cannot give you what I want to give you right nowI said: YOU DID. You gave me your love; you gave me memories. The walk in the rain, the movies we’ve watched, the bus trips. You gave me enough to last me a lifetime.

You said: you’ll soon meet somebody else more worthyI said: I already met him. You made me a better person.

You said: I made a choiceI said: you don’t have to. Cause I know from the start…

You said: one day I’ll be back to see you againI said nothing.
You said: I’m in love with youI said: don’t say it when you don’t mean it. You never heard me say it to you. And when I finally had the courage…
You never said, I’m sorryNeither do I, we don’t have to. It might be painful in the end but we had our times together and they were all wonderful.

Thank you for the memories. We had so much fun and beautiful memories.
Thank you for the times you spent with me, the best times of my life.
Thank you for sharing yourself with me, it may not be that long, but you made a difference.
I thank God for all the wonderful moments we shared together.
Sweetie, thank you…

I love Passage's rendition of this song.
And I'm singing it in my life now... hmmmmm... I wonder...

FOLLOW YOUR ROAD-------------------------------
sung by: Pauline Wilson

With so many roads that seem to lead down to the sea,
I wonder which road will be the right one for me.
Others may fall away, dead ending left and right.
But there is this one road that journeys far out aside.

Have you wondered where your road will lead you?
Maybe to a bright day of sunshine, or a starry night in heaven.
Or it might be you're afraid to go, afraid to go,
But you've got to follow your road, or you'll never know, never know.

We are all but travelers living in a foreign land,
Just trying to find our way best as we can.
Looking for an answer, trying to find some light
And though we have journeyed far, it?s not quite far enough..

Have you wondered where your road will lead you
Maybe to a song that needs singing, or a summer rain(don't be afraid to go)
Or it might be you're afraid to go, afraid to go,
But you've got to follow your road, or you'll never know.

You've got to follow your road, follow your road, follow your road. (3x)
And maybe someday your road will take you far away.

You've got to follow your road, follow your road, follow your road. (3x)
And maybe someday your road will take you far away.

Keep following, and you'll find it,
And someday you will get there
Don't be afraid.

You've got to follow your road, follow your road, follow your road. (3x)